Faggots and Clots

I don't think I can ever master English.
I find it extremely difficult to understand what is written on the menu and I need help.
I can read it but not understand it - it is as if I am reading a different language written in Roman script.
The realization dawned during my last trip to England.
As we sat reading the menu card at a cosy little pub one of our hosts declared that he wishes to have Faggots.
Faggots?
What are Faggots?!?!
Turns out that it is a meat dish (see here)

Another instance: We had arrived early at the St Pancras railway station. As we sat waiting for our train on cold, steel benches (why would anyone design metal benches in cold countries?) the shop in front of us had Clotted Cream written in large, bold letters.
Clotted Cream?
The only other word with which I had associated clot all my life is blood!
Turns out that clotted cream is a delicacy. See here.

I have now come to terms with Hash Browns, which is nothing else but fried potatoes.
But what zap me most are the description of ingredients: meat ball shallow fried in xxxx sauce and served on a bed of rice with a serving of yyyy and zzzz. Most of the time I have no idea what the xxxx, yyyy and zzzz are.

But now we have smart phones to rescue.
Quick!
Look up the ingredient on Wikipedia and you know exactly what you are eating.
Or learn English.